Youth, The twisted
by Iseriad D'angouleme
Summary: Beware my twisted powers. For I have found the Cliche lacking and Have come to rectify the situation. In no way shape or form do I support anyone trying to follow this story as it may lead to brain damage. This is a plot bunny gone mad. Pay no Head...Heed
1. Creation of YOUTH

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, nor do I own any of the characters. As for those I do own I wish I'd never created. I feel dirty now. So dirty... Editor's Note: Little Brothers should not be drinking after bed time.

**The Origins of Youth**

**Somewhere in a disturbingly bright room:**

"Yes! I have done it! I have created the dreadful youth Disease!! Now to carefully put it into the unbreakable container and send it to Orochimaru-sama!" As Amatchi was walking to the table across the room He tripped over an object the mysteriously appeared after seeing a strange yellow flash. "What? NO! If that virus gets out it could destroy the world!" Yells Amatchi as he sees a strange blonde haired child in a white cape running away laughing.

After this was said a konoha jounin stops his search for the sannin's missing student and says, "Yosh, I shall stop this calamity or I will run ten thousand laps around Konoha!" As the jounin dives to save the jar he realizes too late that he is still wearing his five hundred pound weights and that the container clearly states 'Maximum Weight capacity = approx.100 pounds' Adding to this the fact that he and the jar are falling toward the ground and he is going to land on it … well you get the picture.

As the jar hits the ground, and is subsequently hit by the jounin, a light as brilliant as the sun is released. When it dies down a horrendous sight is revealed. The jounin has been transformed into a monstrous creature. One that shall from here on be known as Gai. When staring at the creature, the first thing noticed is the hideous green spandex jumpsuit he is wearing. This alone would be enough to startle most people, but naturally it is coupled with a matching set of orange leg and arm warmers. The next obvious thing is that he seems to be smiling, something that could be more accurately described as a small portion of the sun come to earth. Finally, the most disturbing things about it, is it's 'soup bowl' hair cut that appears to be more of a helmet than hair and it's matching monstrous eyebrows that could easily pass as another creature than a part of Gai itself.

As the scientist sits on the other side of the room, crying from the horror he has unleashed, as well as the fact that it has reduced his eyes to a liquefied jelly upon the ground (we are still unsure which hurt him the most). Gai has started to speak…many Youthful things which shall not be repeated for fear of the authors little remaining sanity, and thus the scourge of Konoha know as Gai the Green Beast Has been born.

**Meanwhile in a cave in a far away country:**

A snake like man named Orochimaru has received news that one of his scientists has discovered a virus that he can use to destroy Konoha. Unfortunately, as he walks into the room being as distracted as he is he bumps into a boy carrying the prototype of said virus and breaks its container forever changing him into the pedophile freak we know today.

______________________________________________________________________________________

**A/N:** I'm scared and amazed at this. I woke up in the middle of the night to get a drink and this popped into my head. I feel violated with writing it but I just had to let the public know how these Things were created… I am deeply ashamed of myself now. Oh well. Review and let me know what you think I could do to make it better or if you think I should add another chapter with things like how Lee came to be the strange demented little man we all know and love.


	2. Challenge for Authors

What if When Naruto was tossed into the ravine by Jiraya He didn't summon gamabunta? What if he summoned something else? Something stronger? This is the challenge. You must figure out a way to add into the Naruto world summons stronger than the ichibi, nibi, and sanbi. They should be for only the summons and the summons should be lesser demons. There must a minimum of 2 girls in it, one blood limit fr Naruto, and a nice kyubi. The summon that Naruto uses must remain the toads. But he must be the only human to ever summon the true boss toad. One that rivals the true size of the kyubi and is stronger than the sanbi at it's best. This is the challenge and I hope that you have fun making it.


	3. Youth Chapter 2: Prolugue

Chapter 2: The Prolugue.

In the end right before finally succumbing to the might of the virus Orochimaru had one last request for Gai to listen to. "Maito Gai," Orochimaru gasps, his breathing labored after the extensive fight, "I am your father!"

"Nooooooooooooooo!", Screams the powerful Jed… Oops wrong story. Lets just rewind and Start from the top… deJ lufrewop eht smaercS ,"!oooooooooooooooN"

"!rehtaf ruoy ma I" ,thgif evisnetxe eht retfa derobal gnihtaerb sih , spsag uramihcorO ",iaG otiaM" . ot netsil ot iaG rof tseuqer tsal dah uramihcorO suriv eht fo thgim eht ot gnibmuccus yllanif erofeb thgir dne eht nI

Alrighty. Now hopefully we can get back on track.

As Naruto was in another portion of the base and Working hard twords the ultimate destruction of the Pedo-snake gai was almost finished with the destruction of Orochimaru himself with the help of Lee and the seventh inner gate. Thanks to the seals made by Naruto and his cloned ex-hating-now-loving little and big sisters and his long trapped mother who hated him right after the sealing but has been since shown the truth (His ex-male-prisoner-turned-female-lover was in the middle of her awesomely powerful ball of destruction jutsu) Gai and Lee were suffering no side effects of the massive power boost besides the uncontrollable chakra not letting them preform ther finishing genjutsu (Thank you almighty lord for sparing our eyes and minds such a sight).

At the last moment before becoming a fine paste Orochimaru decides that he must unleash his most powerful weapon if he was to have any chance of saving himself from the horror, after his first plan of telling Gai and Lee that he was the creator of the Youth virus failed.

"Come forth Madara! It is time to show them the true power of my Creation!" He called as Everything stopped to see what could be a greater offront to the universe than the Beasts.

And lo a great cloud of smoke and lightning appeared around him, and when it was dissipated it revealed…

Orochimaru and Uchiha Madara in hot pink leotards with Bright purple leg warmers. Upon the revelation of this great horror All who saw it besides Naruto, Gai, and Lee were reduced to their constituent particles.

Then the true power was released for the two started hugging! Upon this scene did Naruto look and as he beheld it His mind blew up and the release of chakra from his body destroyed all life on the planet besides Orochimaru, Madara, Gai, and Lee to ash.

However Gai and lee knew nothing of this as tey prepared their own secret weapon. For They had been straining to open the eighth gate (Located in the sphincter) and upon the ashidization of the world they succeded and Gain even greater power. Upon which time they released Their Genjutsu ninjutsu hybrid technique and Reduced The universe to a fine paste in the All mighty's eye upon which time he wiped it off and began anew now knowing to Prevent and mentions of Youth from Ever being born.

The End,

Or is it? (Dun dun dun!)


	4. Author's Note

Author's Note

I, along with many, have been writing and posting on your fine site for years now, some of the better examples of up and coming writers out there are now suddenly finding some of the stories we've come to love at risk of being removed without the chance to even rectify our errors.

For some, that means the permanent loss of a story. While I don't have anything that (I believe) violates your terms of use, there are those out there that are never able to recover a story in its original form, this is something I find to be almost worthy of a legal action, as while we cannot claim ownership of a character, the stories are OURS and simply destroying them is something that is inexcusable.

It's quite easy to simply add an MA rating, additional filters or even a simple requirement for a free membership to read the stories presented here, and would cut down on hateful anonymous reviews and posts at the same time, so I have to question as to why such a thing, in all this time, simply wasn't added.

If you're worried about falsification of a registration then have an appropriate disclaimer and then there can be no dispute, you took your steps and the PARENTS didn't monitor their children, if that is even your concern. If it is more of a personal view or desire then please at least let people know and give them a chance to remove a story that you and yours find offensive, most people on the site are actually rather cordial when it comes to such requests.

While I cannot say for sure if this letter will even reach those that may be willing to listen, of if it's more akin to a wide spectrum purge in preparation for something bigger, please understand that you are going to be losing a LARGE number of your writers, and thus your income from a lack of readers if there is not some level of action taken to help with this situation.

For those that may agree with this, please feel free to sign on and send this to the support server, maybe we can get some movement on this.

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Iseriad D'Angouleme


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